My Doc Appt

~ pretty much copy/pasted from JM~

Well I got taken right back. weighed and my blood pressure taken.. everyone was really nice.. The Doctor then comes in. We talked about infertility and the causes. He asked me a bunch of questions. I told him I chart and showed them to him. He was really impressed that I was so on top of things and said everything I'm doing now is what he would have originally recommended. He's concerned about my irregular cycles (anywhere from 19- 43 days). He was very knowledgeable and made me feel very comfortable. He then did a pelvic exam and said everything felt normal. I got about 8 vials of blood drawn and have an appt to get a transvaginal ultrasound to make sure everything looks ok.

The plan is... to keep trying for the next two cycles with my CBEFM and timed intercourse. If we're not pregnant by then to call and make a new appt (sooner if my blood work and US come back abnormal). At this point he's going to get more aggressive. We spoke of a getting a HSG done and another SA on DH and of course fertility drugs. I'm a little disappointed that he didn't want to do anything more aggressive now, but I understand his reasoning for it. He's pretty confident that I will get pregnant shortly, esp since I've gotten pregnant before, he knows my body's capable of it.

So that was my doc appt.... So I have this cycle.. and next cycle... at the end of that cycle I'm too call and make an appt (since the wait was 3 weeks last time and he doesn't want me to waste another cycle)... I'm kind of anxious, since I've pretty much accepted that I'm not going to get pregnant on my own.. I hate being so pessimistic about it.. but after hitting the 9th month mark.. I can't really help but feel that way.. *sigh*

Cycle 7

So on Friday I started spotting. wasn't too bad so I was hoping it was ovulation spotting.. nope my luck isn't that good... I got AF the next day.. woo freaking hoo right?.. my cycle was only 19 days long .. wtf is up with that??... I hadn't even ovulated or anything yet... I really honestly hate my body..

My GYN appt is in 9 days.. I can't wait... hopefully they can do something for me because this is seriously getting really ridiculous... ugh.

JM Vent

Sorry if I've been kind of a downer lately ladies.. I've been depressed with everything lately.. I'm starting to feel like we're never going to get pregnant.. I've been dwelling on the fact that my body isn't meant to carry a baby.. I've been pregnant before, seen my baby on U/S heard the heartbeat.. but unfortunately I m/c.. I can't get the feeling out of the back of my mind that that was my one and only shot.. It's not like it's just me who has a problem.. DH has a low sperm count.. Mix that in there and I just feel worse..

We're supposed to go back to CT in July for my sisters wedding and I've been dreading it for months... I'm the one who got married first.. but both my sisters already have children and are happy.. It tears me up inside.. I don't know anyone IRL who has tried at all.. they all just happened to get pg right away.. hell one of my sisters got pg on BCP.. this is so freaking frustrating... all anyone says is to relax, that it'll happen when it's meant too.. ahh it makes me want to scream.. I don't know how much longer I can do this.... I hope we get some good news on the 2nd at my doc appt.. *sigh*

Doc Appt?

Still on Cycle 6/Month 8.. currently on CD 10 (about to be CD 11 but its not past midnight yet buahahaha)...

I made an appointment with my PCM for a referral... had that last Friday... Got lost trying to find her office though.. Tricare told Jeff that she was located inside the hospital on base.. so not true.. she was at a clinic OFF base... blah that sucked.. so I was late for my appointment.. but I got in .. talked to her about everything thats been going on (Shes really nice and I like the clinic.. FINALLY found a good doc down here).. she put in a referral for me to go to the OB/GYN clinic..

Called Tricare Monday.. my referral went through. called the clinic to make an appointment.. the lady on the phone asked if I was making an appointment because I was pregnant (thanks for rubbing it in that I'm not).. I told her no. it was to talk about infertility... blah.. the closest available appt they had was on July 2nd.... nothing sooner *sigh*.. I *can* call every day to see if there's a cancellation but Jeff just can't get up and leave work at the drop of a hat to take me.. so gotta wait till July.. I suppose thats not soo bad though.. my cycles are long so I should have just O'd..

Well guess I'll give another update after the appointment

Cycle 6/Month 8

So I started spotting last night (5/31) it was very very light so I didn't think that much of it. But I woke up this morning with AF.. UGH WTF? why can't I fucking get pregnant.. stupid stupid... SO NOW we're on MONTH 8. and cycle 6 (I hate long cycles can't get anything right)

Well I got a ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor (CBEFM) so I'll be using that this cycle. I reset the memory and started it up this morning so that's all set to go.. hopefully that works because I'm seriously starting to lose hope that it'll ever happen..